I’m getting baptized tomorrow.
All week, my heart’s been filled with thoughts and reflections on who I was and who I am now, what I’ve experienced and what I’m experiencing now — and how God’s plan for me is woven throughout all of those moments.
“No matter what comes, you will never leave. I know you’re for me, and you’re restoring. Every heartache and failure, every broken dream, you’re the God who sees, the God who rescued me. This is my story.”
~ Britt Nicole
I was saved as a child, but it was only a head belief for me — not a heart belief. It wasn’t until about five years ago, that my relationship with Christ took root in my heart.
The change occurred after a relationship I had invested a huge portion of my heart and time into came to an end. In the midst of that broken time, God provided, and I found myself blessed with real, authentic friendships with some amazing Christian women who challenged me and encouraged me to grow in my faith. Slowly, I started to see what a relationship with Christ looked like and what it could mean for my life. I realized that for so many years, I had been keeping God at a distance, and I realized that during those very same years, He was patiently pursuing me, waiting for my heart to soften and let Him in. And even though I hadn’t been acknowledging Him, He’d still been there, by my side, walking with me.
As I look back on the last five years, I see all the changes that have occurred in my heart. I see the ways God has been refining me and making me a more authentic, true version of myself. I see His faithfulness in the way He’s guided me through some difficult moments and seasons. And I see the way He’s been teaching me, building my faith, and deepening my relationship with Him.
I’m still learning and seeking today, five years later, as I watch each new chapter unfold, according to His will for me. This season, my heart holds a lot of questions, hopes, and possibilities. I see God working in so many ways right now, doing incredible things in me and around me. And every day, even on the days I feel overwhelmed, worried, or unsure …